I wouldn't say I'm a part of the Sex and the City generation, but I've experienced the tail end of the whole spectacle. Sex and the City troubles me as I'm confused by what these women symbolize in our culture. They certainly aren't run of the mill women, women who don't dress up in designer clothes every day and don't go out every night. The show definitely targets upper-middle class women, and I'd like to delve into all of the stuff, things, messages, ideas, etc... that I see in the Sex and the City television series and movies. The women are not domestic at all, they're independent, and live on their own most of the time. They're all working, as a publicist, an author/columnist, a lawyer, and an art gallery manager. They wear beautiful clothes constantly, and go out almost every night. While these women seem like single ladies living it up in New York, they're constantly talking about men and show an extreme reliance on having men around. These independent women are miserable when they haven't found the one, and then they're miserable when they have. They certainly face problems that seem endemic to the female gender or actually anyone mixing and mingling and settling down in a modern world. They worry about weight, and image, and they've addressed the subject of STDs, cancer, and other worries that often appear in an adult's life, (or that I assume appear in the lives of adults). The independence that Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte, and Samantha demonstrates is decidedly temporary. They live for the future men in their lives, and look forward to settling down and living their lives with a partner, usually a financially stable one. Even Samantha, who is by far the most free-spirited and least likely to settle down of them all, ends up spending five years in a monogamous relationship with a movie star before breaking free and getting back to her man-eating ways.

The one thing they never seem to worry about is money. They live decadent lives that are stable. Their apartments are beautiful, their clothes flawless, and constantly regenerating. They eat out every meal at fancy restaurants and attend over-the-top events. Money, something that dictates the lives of most Americans, even those in the middle class, doesn't even come up in the show. It's easy to absorb oneself into the narrative and sparkle, but there is one key thing missing in these women's lives, the worry about money.

Another interesting part of this television show is how the writers address the topic of children and the roles children play in a woman's life. Children in Sex and the City are like accessories. They don't get in the way of all the glamour. In the first movie, Lily, Charlotte's adopted daughter sits around while they discuss "grown up" stuff and then answers a phone call by saying "sex." She clearly has spent a lot of time sitting with the women as they discuss what they almost never stop discussing. In the trailer for the second Sex and the City movie, Carrie tells Lily that their lives are like the Princess Jasmine, except "with cocktails." Domestic life doesn't disallow Miranda and Charlotte, who have children, from traveling to Abu Dhabi for a major vacation in the second movie, even as Charlotte complains about how overwhelming motherhood is. Middle class women can't fly to Abu Dhabi with a bunch of girlfriends on a whim, and it seems questionable that the rest of them, who are not stay at home mothers but who work, are able to free themselves from their lives as easily.

I'm wondering how Sex and the City contributes to the idea of the New York woman and her life in the city that pervades my generation's goals and plans for the future. For starters, let's say that four normal, real girls were able to secure the jobs that the women in Sex and the City are lucky enough to have. They probably wouldn't be able to afford the apartments that these women have, in such great locations, and the clothes, nor would they so readily meet men of such different backgrounds. Working women in New York seem to be very busy, and probably mingle primarily with men in their offices or in their trade. My friend's sister works as a second year lawyer in New York, and works from 6 to 10 some days. She doesn't get to go out to parties or balls every night, and while she has a beautiful new apartment, she doesn't have a relationship and hasn't met many people since moving to New York from Yale law school. So many girls dream of ending up in New York one way or another, whether it's as an actor or singer or a lawyer or doctor. I have many friends who aspire to life after college in New York. They literally dream of things found in Sex and the City, of glamorous parties, and fashion shows. Two times at Andover, I've had friends compare a group of people to the women from Sex and the City. Freshman year I was Charlotte, this year I'm Samantha. I have little in common with the women, yet at some point someone thought I had "mannerisms" like Charlotte, and looked like Samantha and these things instantly secured a spot for me in the Sex and the City fantasy. A lot of my friends will probably end up wealthy, like these girls, and will end up with wonderful jobs, but they aren't going to fall into them after Andover.

At Andover, we've spent four years as very privileged people. Our parents give us monthly allowances so that we can go into Boston, and go downtown. We have activities planned and paid for us by the school, and we live in a beautiful place surrounded by people who are intelligent and thoughtful and push us to think for ourselves and to think about the world. When we look into the future it looks like it'll be similar to the life we live now in terms of financial stability and intellectual pursuits, yet that just doesn't seem to be realistic. My parents will absolutely cut me off after medical school. They've dropped a small fortune on Andover and on the programs I chose to do my upper year, and I imagine will continue to spend a lot on me so that I can pursue the education I want. They're amazing people for paying so willingly for everything I've wanted to do in my life, and I would feel quite strange packing up after college or med school and going to New York and continuing to live off of their money to maintain a privileged lifestyle until I get off the ground. There's no way I'd be able to get to New York and immediately start living a life of glamour like the women from Sex and the City. We girls also seem to forget that these women are not in their twenties. One of the main things that plagued Carrie in early Sex and the City was turning 30. They've had eightish years to make money and settle down, but we never saw the studio apartments or the late night jobs and takeout dinners. Shows such as Gossip Girl further glamorize the New York lifestyle, as the characters who have just graduated from high school, all live and work in New York and live luxurious lives. They are openly wealthy and privileged though, and overtly mooch off of their parents, so it's a little less conceivable that we would ever live their lives. With Sex and the City we've seem to have been convinced more that we'll be able to live a life like this. Sex and the City women don't talk about how lucky or abnormal their lives are. Noooo, they're normal girls. Sure, they're incredibly fashionable and gifted, but in the end, they're just a group of gals trying to find love in the Big Apple. Even with all of my qualms and concerns about a dream like this, I still want to end up in New York. The glamour means less to me, as I hate wearing high heels and would do terribly released upon high society, but I want an exciting life. More than anything these women seem cosmopolitan and happy. Even with all their man troubles, everything turns out okay. Since they all have different careers and personalities, it seems conceivable that anyone can find a life like theirs in New York. I want to be a doctor, and I know I have many 21 hour days ahead of me and years of working holidays, but I would love to do it in a city where dreams come true, and be surrounded by interesting people. The myth of Sex and the City is a dangerous one, as it sets up any middle class girl to believe that a wonderful life in New York City is attainable no matter your hair color or shoe size or career. Faludi's theses that in post-911 America there has been a pull back to the house is represented in Sex and the City as well. Even though in the first few seasons none of them settled down, now they're all looking to settle down and have children. Sure, they don't represent the family with three kids living in the burbs that seems to be representative of the post-911 family mold, but they represent the desire to be domestic that has been sparked in women in America. None of these girls are feminists. The closest one to a feminist was Miranda, who ended up taking her cheating husband back, and settling back down in her family based life. In one episode Carrie and Samantha even go to a firefighter's gala on an island at which firefighters of the town will model for the guests. They end up meeting firemen and having a great time, and in the episode there are women oozing over the firefighters. I see a lot of Susan Faludi's theses manifested in Sex and the City, even behind its facade of individuality and free-spiritedness.